Survivor, Glee, Criminal Minds, House, American Idol, Chopped, Pawn Stars, Law and Order: SVU, Switched at Birth, Weeds
school, ASL, psychology, theater, writing
My name is Gerynn and this is my blog♥
Photo reblogged from Color me confused. with 346 notes
I should have thought of that when I had the chance.
Too bad I have no real reason to stay anymore… But hey! That’s a good reason to go, right?
Source: Flickr / underscore_ian
Photo reblogged from Color me confused. with 14,518 notes
Paul Schmidtberger, Design Flaws of the Human Condition
Source: aseaofquotes
I take my advice from Dumbledore.
“—yet, sadly, accidental rudeness occurs alarmingly often. Best to say nothing at all, my dear man.”
- Me: we have some salvia left over...
- Trotter: pfffft, salvia is fake, like jesus!
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Hey everyone!
Did you know my life is perfect!? I sure didnt, but apparently it is! I’ll just go enjoy my perfect life while silly girls deal with silly drama, because my life is perfect. Perfect, perfect, perfect!
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Oh silly girls
I’m so tired of girl drama. I know that might sound incredibly ironic coming from me, but I am, lol. There is literally only 5 girls in my life that I will listen to, put up with, and even encourage the typical “girl drama” from: Kyleigh Rae, Lauren Brown, Melanie, Cori, and Joey. Why? Because they’ve all been there for me through thick and thin, and put up with all of MY shit when my life seemed to be nothing but drama. And because we’ve all grown up… We have better things to do than sit around and make up stories about people, talk a bunch of shit about people, or fan fires that we know aren’t that hard to flame up. For the past year and a half, I’ve also had another girl in my life that I considered part of that list. I should’ve listened to myself when I told Jon I didn’t like her very much when I first met her. She talked about how legendary “Ben mother fuckin klumpp” was, which was a put off in and of itself, was always talking shit about people, and her and her sister were constantly saying “ew!” which was also kind of annoying. But because Ray and her started getting closer, and after awhile basically became boyfriend/girlfriend, I let her grow on me, and when my own best friend and I had a falling out, she became the only girl friend I really had in Kyle. When she would say some things I didn’t agree with, or obviously make stories up, I would chalk it up to her being in high school and remind myself that I was very similar when I was the same age. I know that sounds cheesy because I’m only 2 years older, but having a baby and getting married kind of ages you like.. 10 years.
Anyways, I began to really love this girl and even considered her to be my best friend. When Jon and I wanted to hang out with people, her and Ray were always my first choice. I never minded listening to the constant complaining about how Ray wasn’t like “Granberry” and how much of a douche Ray was, and how he wouldn’t do the things she wanted him to do and why couldn’t he be like my husband?! While I appreciated the sentiment that my husband was superman, after the first 300 times of comparing Ray to Jon, I was beginning to wish my husband wasn’t so amazing, lol.
Then, about a year ago, she tells me she needs to talk to me, and it’s important. I had very recently lost my best friend and was trying to encourage us getting closer, so I didn’t hesitate to meet her at Chili’s for dinner. She then proceeded to show me a message that exposed Ray as a cheater from the other party involved. I won’t go into a lot of detail because I don’t want Ray’s business flashed all over the internet, but it was very bad, and very damaging to Ray. I whole-heartedly believed the story, because I saw the proof first hand, and didn’t think that she would be crazy enough to make that up. All I’ll say is it was very, very bad, and so crazy it didn’t seem possible if the email hadn’t been there. They weren’t technically dating because Ray seems to have some commitment issues, and I don’t think he wanted to be seen dating a girl who was still in high school, but they were basically together, so I felt bad for her and offered as much consolance as I could.
Fast forward about 6 months, and she brings up the story again, but this time says she’s seen pictures that this person has sent to Ray. At this point they were living together, still not officially dating (even though everyone knew they were together), so it was a little more impacting for him to be seeing the same person for that long, and cheating on her. I told her she needed to confront him, especially if she had proof, and she said when she did he just griped about her going through his phone.
Then about two months ago she said that there were more pictures and more texts back and forth from him and “the other woman”. I couldn’t take being the only person that knew about it other than her, so I told my husband. He’s the type of person who wants to stay out of other peoples business as much as possible so he didn’t do much of anything except to tell me he was sorry I had to know about it.
Over the past two months, we haven’t really hung out with them very much because our lives are so busy, and because I don’t really like being the only one stuck in the room with nothing but negativity. It was like, every time the boys left to go outside to smoke, she pounced on the chance to tell me every single thing Ray did to make her angry, and that she didn’t like. She also always told him he was fat in front of everyone. Always. Ray doesn’t have that much self-esteem as it is. It’s not a joke when that’s all he hears. I’m sure behind closed doors, their relationship was a lot more loving, because Ray seemed to be legitimately happy for the most part, and hell, they were even apartment hunting for the past couple of weeks… but I think Ray was happy that he had someone that loved his son, and took care of him, not as an actual possible future wife. He basically had a free babysitter for a year and a half, as harsh as that sounds.
Yes, I agree that this girl loved Aidan with all of her heart… but that doesn’t mean that there isn’t someone else out there that will love him just as much. In fact, I know there is, because I believe with all my heart that everyone has their perfect match.
I do care about her, but I think she’s lost and she needs some help finding out who she is… but it’s not Aidan’s mom. Aidan already has a mom, a damn good one (that she basically caused to hate me, for reasons I’ll never know) he doesn’t need another one… especially one who still has a lot of growing up to do.
Photoset reblogged from I don't dance with 42,994 notes
gay people have all the best signs
that last one is my favorite.
Just.. Yes.
Source: avatar-erika
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Cheesy moment time.
“watching that movie made me start thinking about how you never really know what you have until it’s lost and how lucky I am, that I got a second chance…. Because I lost you and realized what I was missing, and I got to get you back again. I don’t know, talking to Trotter and I know a lot of girls in the past it’s happened to…. But I’m so lucky because I got you in the end. So… Thank you for sticking around, haha. I know it doesn’t always seem like it, but I do love you so much, and even when it doesn’t seem like it, I truly am happy, and completely in love with you. ”
I had to write this down before I forgot it verbatim, which is highly doubtful but i just wanted everyone else to know that my husband is the best man in the entire world. I love him. And he made me cry tonight, lol.
I haven’t wanted to talk about what’s going on in my head because talking about it makes it real… But I think I’m only making things worse by keeping my thoughts to myself.
About a month ago, I started taking Prozac to try to get out of the huge cloud of depression I’m under, only it’s not working and it’s not just depression.
I don’t have any emotional connection to anyone. ANYONE. Not Jon, not my parents, not my siblings… And the worst one.. Not to my son.
When I look at him, it’s like I’m looking at someone else’s kid. Like, I know he’s mine, but he’s not. The same way with Jon, the same way with my family and the same way with my own reflection. I feel like I’m going fucking crazy. I don’t want to tell Jon because he wouldn’t understand and it would only scare him. I’m just hoping I can get it under control before I loose my mind and do something stupid to myself. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to kill myself… But I’d be lying if I said the thought hasn’t crossed my mind.
Ive been researching, and I think my psychological symptoms most closely fall under a depersonalization disorder…. But I don’t know how to fix it. I feel like no matter what meds I switch to, it won’t take away my thoughts or take away my feelings, and I’ll be living in a fog for the rest of my life. It’s so fucking scary, and all I can do now is hope that someone can throw me a rope to pull me back into reality, because right now I’m so lost.
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